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08 June 2005

Screaming Memes

So Zalm tagged me in this little game. Basically I’m supposed to pick five professions from the list below and finish the sentence. And I believe I get to add professions if I choose. So I added professional wrestler. Now can you dig it?

If I could be a scientist…
If I could be a farmer…
If I could be a musician…
If I could be a doctor…
If I could be a painter…
If I could be a gardener…
If I could be a missionary…
If I could be a chef…
If I could be an architect…
If I could be a linguist…
If I could be a psychologist…
If I could be a librarian…
If I could be an athlete…
If I could be a lawyer…
If I could be an inn-keeper…
If I could be a professor…
If I could be a writer…
If I could be a llama-rider…
If I could be a bonnie pirate…
If I could be an astronaut…
If I could be a world famous blogger…
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world…
If I could be married to any current famous political figure…
If I could be a service member…
If I could be a photographer…
If I could be a philanthropist…
If I could be a rap artist…
If I could be a child actor…
If I could be a secret agent…
If I could be a comedian/comedienne…
If I could be a priest…
If I could be a radio announcer…
If I could be a phlebotomist…
If I could be Paris Hilton’s stylist…
If I could be the CEO of Microsoft…
If I could be a movie producer…
If I could be a laser hair removal specialist…
If I could be a dog groomer…
If I could be a bicycle repairman…
If I could be a Lumberjack…
If I could be chauffer for Michael W. Smith…
If I could be a Head Football Coach…
If I could be an insurance adjuster…
If I could be funeral home director…
If I could be a bus driver…
If I could be me…
If I could be Secretary of State…
If I could be an assassin…
If I could be a whore…
If I could be a game developer…
If I could be a vampire slayer…
If I could be a nerf herder…
If I could be a professional wrestler…


Anyways, here goes:

If I could be a phlebotomist…I’d quickly learn what my profession means, so I wouldn’t have to Google it and feel ashamed.

If I could be a Lumberjack…I’d cut down trees. I’d eat my lunch. I’d go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I’d go shoppin' and have buttered scones for tea.

If I could be a rap artist…I wouldn’t, because Sage Francis already said it, and much better.

If I could be a professional wrestler…I’d finish off opponents with my patented finishing maneuver, the dreaded genital jihad.

If I could be me… I'd sing and dance (la la-la hey, la la-la hey, la la-la).

OK then. So now I’m supposed to tag three people. I don’t think my wife, Meg or Liz have played yet, so get to it.

Comments on "Screaming Memes"

 

Anonymous zalm said ... (6/08/2005 02:05:00 AM) : 

i knew you'd come through in the clutch. having that hanging over your head for a month would have taken all the fun out of your trip, i'm sure.

seriously though, have a great time.

 

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